Thursday, January 3, 2008

Searching For A Resolution

What, I asked myself, will you make as your New Year’s resolution? It has been my rule in the last few years not to make resolutions, after all, I reasoned, why set a goal that is practically guaranteed to fail. It all seemed a little silly to me. I honestly cannot recall ever having made a New Year’s resolution that I actually kept and still, for some inexplicable reason I feel compelled to make them. This year I decided that making a resolution not to make a resolution was, well… a little too eccentric even for me. Choice; either make a resolution or ignore the impulse, decision; make one.

I have decided that 2008 is the year that I matter. What I think, feel, want and need are important and I have got to remember that. No wonder people treat me as a second thought and find it easy to disregard my opinion and feelings. If I don’t value myself no one else will value me; and all that other prattle you read about in the self-help books. Part of my resolution is that every day I will do at least one thing that is important to me or something that I want to do. I got off to a good start New Year’s Day, I watched Return of The King. I have wanted to watch that movie (well actually all of the Lord of the Rings movies) for ages. I also plan to continue with meditation; my hope is that I will somehow (in my drugged fog) find my center and then be able to view the world with more kindly eyes. I am convinced that if there were more compassion and kindness in the world many of our problems would cease to exist.

Today I hope (with Don’s help) to get the house set back to rights; Christmas decorations put away and the excess culled out and sent on to Good Will. This evening, I think I’ll watch one of my “Chick Flicks” while Don is out practicing with his kids. Ah, so many possibilities!

There is always hope.

Betty

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