Were I a bird I would be laying in the bottom my cage, trembling from my efforts to ignore the pain of my broken wing and return to the safety of my perch. It is the best analogy I have at the moment because it is the way I feel, broken and worn down by too many sleepless nights and too much time spent tumbling the known and unknown problems in my mind as if they are worry beads in my hand.
Through all of this, I have been fortunate enough to have my own personal knight in running clothes; Don has been supportive and understanding. Agoraphobia is not something I would wish on anyone. Any progress I have made in defiance of that fear is a credit to Don. He pushes me out the door and makes me leave the house. He always puts me in a situation of either crowds or big spaces. I guess I had to begin somewhere; this is as good as any.
I have not felt like writing; possibly because the medication makes me drowsy or perhaps the worry beads in my mind keep me distracting me. Whatever the reason I hope to return to posting regularly soon, when I get back to writing I will feel like have made huge progress.
There is always hope.
